October 24, 2012 by musehick
Man, I have been a little absent from everywhere that I post. My concentration has been somewhat squashed. Have not been working for a while and the stress is starting to burn me out. It is weird how stress can totally strip the goodness out of sleep and put you into a state where you just kind of drift through day to day without really finding any kind of purchase in them. I have a semi-schedule but I am finding myself frustrated to the point that I kind of shutdown and don’t do anything.
I have turned out the odd poem here and there and I have been reading quite a lot, so I haven’t been totally idle, but it is nowhere near the level of production that I desire to be hitting. I am going to have to remedy this and handle my money situation. Not wanting to work some crappy job seems to be getting in the way of me finding any kind of job, so I need to just change my mind and get myself something. The perfect job is just round the corner – I can feel it.
When I am working and time seems hard to find I get lots done. When time is plentiful and I can kind of coast shit gets left hanging. I am so fed up with incomplete cycles of action. Need to change that.